He Said, She Said with Cornelius and Delilah

He Said, She Said with Cornelius and Delilah
  1. Is courage a real thing or do we make it up to give an excuse for acting like a good human being?

HE SAID: Courage is a real made up thing.  Does it exist? Yes. Do people have real courage? Maybe. As Thoreau said, “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation”. I agree with him. Most people don’t break out of this desperation, and perhaps that’s what real courage requires. Advice time: break out of your own desperation! Explore! Rejoice in the sheer beauty of life! Don’t condemn yourself to a life full of internal longing for more, go and find whatever it is you are searching for.

SHE SAID: No, there is no such thing as real, tangible courage. Do tell me though, why would you need an excuse to act like a good human being? If you feel a certain motivation to act on this so-called courage and do a good deed, what’s stopping you?

  1. Do you think it’s worth it to start a relationship senior year?

HE SAID: You’re going to leave in a year, so unless you are committed to having a potentially long-distance relationship I don’t think it’s worth formalizing. Instead, just keep it light and fun. If you discover that you really do like that person, go for it; but remember you might never see them again in a year.

SHE SAID: By this point in your high school career, you’ve most likely figured out who you are (at least a little). Dating people can help you figure out who you are, and can be fun! Why not give it a go? It is only October, so you’ve still got a good few months to turn that flirtatious chatting into something more. Keep in mind though, that high school relationships are usually just that, a high school relationship. Try it out, but head in with few expectations and the awareness that if you start falling for this person, you’ll have to make the tough decision of what to do with this relationship before you head off to your future.

  1. I like this girl, but she has a boyfriend. And she flirts with me a lot. I want to respect their relationship. And I don’t want them to break up because they are happy. So what do I do? Call her out or just continue having fun?

HE SAID: Call her out! She’s flirting with you “a lot” which is unfair to her boyfriend, so she needs to get her priorities straight, man.

SHE SAID: Before you proceed, take a look at this girl you’re lusting after. Are you the only one receiving not-so-subtle arm grazes or her adorable winks? Some people just have more flirtatious personalities, so if she’s acting more than friendly to multiple guys, leave it be. If you seem to be the only boy (other than the boyfriend) who’s receiving this extra attention, speak up! This conversation might be uncomfortable to have, but having everyone on the same page (all three of you in your little love triangle) will make sure no one is misinterpreting these signals.

  1. How do you distinguish between a rebound and genuine feelings?

HE SAID: You don’t. But if your new relationship ends within a month, I’m pretty sure it’s safe to call it a rebound. So just wait about a month, and if you feel the same about the new person as you did at the beginning of the month, it’s probably genuine. If you are already getting tired of them, safe to call it a rebound.

SHE SAID: Often times, rebounds serve the sole purpose of replacing your ever-so-present feelings of post relationship loneliness with butterflies in your stomach we all know too well. Rather than looking to another to help you move on, take a look at yourself. Are you constantly longing for another to be by your side? For a hand to hold? For a cutie to smooch? If you’re answering yes to any of these, this is most likely a rebound. In this case, get yourself to a state where you can scream loud and proud your newfound single status and move on fully from your past relationship. Once you’re confident in yourself, take a gander at those feelings you had before. Still there? Go for it.