Santa Claus of Two-Thousand Ten (To the tune of Santa Claus is Coming to Town)

You’d better watch out. You’d better not cry

You’d better wave all your presents goodbye

I’m Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.

I’m making a list of who’s naughty and nice

With elves hacking your electronic device

Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.

I not only hear the words that you speak

I read the profanity you tweeted last week

Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.

I see you when you’re sleeping

I know when you’re awake

I know that you’re out partying from your Facebook Places update.

I’ll look at your photos. I’ll look at your friends.

I’ll show Mrs. Claus how you spend your weekends.

Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.

I’ll give your bank record a thorough inspection

You should have used Wi-Fi with password protection

Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.

There’s no profile I can’t pick at,

No website I can’t hack.

I’ll steal your identity if you don’t leave me some snacks.

So you might be mad, but better me than

An admissions officer at the U of M.

Santa Claus of two-thousand ten.